The Russian Mafia

I was in the city of Tombov in southern Russia working at a summer camp and having a great time.  One day we decided it would be fun to take a van full of kids to see one of the new Star Wars movies that had just come out.   After watching the movie the kids headed back to camp but a few friends and I thought it would be fun to hang around the city for a bit.  I don't speak a word of Russian and my translators had great fun getting me to say ridiculous things to people to laugh at my ignorance.  I didn't mind much as I got a kick out of the confused expressions on peoples faces when I would ask them if they had my ice cream or if they could give me directions to our current location.  Towards the end of our goofing around in the city we were in the van heading back to camp.  Suddenly out of nowhere this black fancy looking car cuts us off and nearly causes an accident SO I yelled out the window as loud as I could something to the effect of, "Listen retard... I'm going to punch you in the head!!!"  This caused immediate and legitimate fear in the Russians in the van with us.  I noticed the van picking up speed and the Russians frantically talking to each other with a panicked look on their faces.  Then the translator turned to us Americans in the Van and said, "If the car comes to the side of the van...DUCK!"  It was then that I realized we were in a high speed car chase running from the Russian Mafia.  we were weaving in and out of traffic and blowing through red lights, even driving up on sidewalks to try to get away but the black car stayed on our tail.  We then came to a busy intersection where there was no option but to stop.  The black car came up to our side and a bunch of sinister looking guys got out screaming in violent sounding Russian.  One of these guys then picked up what looked like a boulder from the side of the road and lifted it up to smash our van window.  Our driver then pulled one of the most awesome maneuvers any one has ever done in a Russian Van and managed to get us through the busy intersection without getting smashed by the oncoming traffic.  After a few quick turns we had lost the black car and started on our way back to camp.  The translator kept saying, "thank God they did not have guns" and, "I hope they did not get our license plate...they will find us and kill us!"  To this day some of the friends that were there still talk about, "The time Tim almost got us killed by the Russian mafia" .... Hey... at least they have a good story to tell!